lovers

Following from RealMen’s post on the curious notion that writers make the best lovers – where he talks about how he tried to tempt a rather lovely lady away from a very talented Art Director – I thought I’d do the honest thing and balance it out with actual facts. The main one being that Art Directors effortlessly make the best lovers (and pretty much everything else).

Let’s set out facts 1-5.

#1. The Art Director is a master at using imagination.

Just think how that differs from the logical, forward planning nature of a suit – imaginative trips away, an ability to pick special glorious gifts, a love for colour, decoration and clothes. Also, if things go well, an ability to design the perfect wedding AND ring  – “every partner’s dream” I hear you say.

#2. The Art Director is balanced and sensitive.

Now this doesn’t mean you’ll come home to find a male one dressed in your bra and panties whilst singing into a hairbrush, or that a female one will cry at the weather. No, it means that their sensitive side means a more caring, a more understanding, a more balanced lover.

#3. A male Art Director is still a real man.

Perhaps this is a personal clearance, but point 2 doesn’t mean that male art directors aren’t all man. They’ll still uphold your ideals of real men and drink beer with your father, or fix your car on a Saturday afternoon. In fact the art director is far better placed at DIY that a suit, I read that somewhere so it must be true.

#4. The Art Director enjoys shopping for the house.

Hacked off with suit types slipping into boring t-shirts and watching the footie down the pub whilst you try and pick some taps or pick the new wallpaper? Or perhaps a female art director who has a distinct lack of taste in décor or art? A gripe familiar with many no doubt. Well behold, the art director will wax lyrical over the smallest details: The form of that bath set you love, the ergonomic brilliance of that tap you desire, design a bespoke wall feature for the baby’s bedroom, and even make decisions without you that won’t let you down. Imagine that! Sometimes over-perfection can cloud fast judgment – but it’s a small price to pay.

#5.  I should begin wrapping this up, as there are way to many benefits to list in one post, obviously. So the final fact, is that in a survey recently, over 9/10 people voted Art Directors as the lover of choice. I’ve lost the link to it now, but It’s definitely true.

So the next time someone who tells you that they work in advertising chats you up, check which department/team/floor they work for and decide.

So as they used to say on Blind Date; will it be the suit who over promises, the writer who’s all words, or the art director who’s balanced perfection makes them the perfect catch?” It’s over to you…

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